culture shock: rolling with the punches
I don’t have any exciting stories for you today. But I didn’t want to leave my 10 faithful readers disappointed, I know you’ve just been dying with anticipation for my next post ;) So we’ll talk about something different today. A lot of people have told me the same thing in the last few years: "I’m so jealous of you! I wish I could travel the world and live in foreign country. Your life is so exciting and adventurous, lucky! You're so brave for roughing it like that."
And I just smile, mentally let out a sigh and think, "so go do it!". The truth is, it’s not as glamorous or adventurous as people think. I’m not bushwhacking through the rainforest delivering life-saving vaccines to children who have no access to a medical facility. I don’t live in a hut (although I’ve always wanted to), I don’t sit cross-legged in a circle while teaching community members the importance of keeping the water supply clean or how to plant sustainable crops (that’s my next goal). Yes, I have hot water, internet and a flushing toilet. I work 9 hours a day, most days in a hospital office. Change takes a lot longer than one might expect. I’m sorry to have dashed your grandiose illusions of my life. But yes, you are right, some things are definitely different and more difficult, but at the end of the day it really just comes down to your attitude, which sometimes isn’t entirely rational. As anyone who as ever traveled knows, one of the hardest things to deal with is Culture Shock. Everyone gets it, even people who travel a lot, although sometimes to a lesser extent. Often, it is subtle. Unlike its name, there are few occasions when you are downright shocked or flabbergasted by an event or custom.
4 stages of culture shock are generally labeled: honeymoon stage, the frustration stage,the depression stage, and finally, the acceptance stage. I’ve taken the liberty to describe them a bit for you based on my experiences and those of my peers.
1.Honeymoon stage, a.k.a, This is awesome!! Dude, look at all the awesome colors! Even the buildings that are crumbling have more character and look more artistic than any American building. Look and the cute little old man with no teeth and those cute little kids with no shoes trying to sell food to passersby. It’s so exotic and quaint at the same time! Did you see how the women carry their babies on their backs with just that little blanket to keep them from falling? Did you see that they sell water here in plastic little baggies instead of bottles? And milk comes in liter cartons than don’t have to be refrigerated until they are opened. That’s really smart. Everyone is so nice and accommodating. I love this place, I’m going to take pictures of EVERYTHING. This is going to be pure awesomeness. Best trip EVER.
2. Frustration stage, a.k.a, Rolling of the eyes. Ugh, why can’t people shower before coming onto the bus? Is it just me or does the whole country mumble when they talk while simultaneously yelling? How come they don’t sell cheeseburgers here? Don’t they know that they shouldn’t buy food from a vendor who just sneezed on her hand? Those kids aren’t so cute anymore after they tried to hustle me for that bag of mangos. Fantastic, another night without electricity. These crumbling buildings aren’t so quaint anymore, they keep leaking rain water on my bed. Do I have to do everything myself, everyone is so incompetent. Why doesn’t anyone pay attention to the stop signs or traffic signals? Don´t they have emissions laws here, there is so much smog coming out of these cars! Why don’t they have cheese burgers here?!! Could there be any more stray dogs around here, I mean, seriously.
3. Depression stage, a.k.a I wanna go hoommmmmmmmmmmme!!!! (while throwing a hissy fit and stomping your feet and hands on the ground.) This place sucks. Why did I ever come here? This was a mistake, I haven’t done anything, I’m wasting my time, people don’t listen to me, I don’t have any friends and no one to talk to. Did I mention that this sucks? I STILL can’t speak the language and I feel like an idiot. I’m tired of all these bugs and having to kill giant ants with my bare hands. This is really hard, there’s no way I can accomplish what I came here to do. If one more person calls me gringa/branca/ Americana/ la chica/ mi amor/baby, I’m going to slap him upside the head. And for the love of Pete, can’t I just cross the street one time without being almost run over/honked at/ whistled at/ winked at/ being asked for money/ or being given the evil eye? I want to eat ice cream and cheeseburgers and walk on carpet and flush toilet paper down the toilet. This place is death. How do these people handle living here? I miss my mommy.
4. Acceptance stage, a.k.a, Sigh, I better pick myself off the floor, I look kinda silly down here. Okay, so I may have overreacted, just a tiny incy wincy little bit. I can’t go home, I promised myself/my boss/my organization that I would stay for X amount of time. It’s really not that bad, I just got to suck it up, pull it together and reign in that trembling bottom lip. Remember a few months ago when I met my two friends and we went on that awesome hike and celebrated by birthday? That was pretty cool. And don’t forget about last week when I was able to convince my boss that on the importance of monthly evaluations? And did you see that those patients were actually reading your educational posters?! And remember when you were walking in town and someone asked YOU for directions?
This is the stage where all my years playing volleyball kick in, when you yell these chants to encourage each other: Okay, you got this, you can do it! (Get) right back (up)! Be aggressive! Push through, we’re almost there! Stay on your toes! Anticipate! Great kill! Dive, sacrifice your body! Okay, maybe that last two aren’t really relevant here, but you get my point, this whole stage can be summed up with: I think I can, I think I can, I think I can, I CAN! Take a deep breath kid, you got this! ¡ánimo!
And then, repeat steps 1-4. Yes, that’s right, it’s not over, this is a never ending cycle. For some strange reason, I never seem to get stage 2, but everyone is different. Your whole time abroad will be filled with culture shock, though the longer you are the there the longer the acceptance and honeymoon phase will be and the less intense the frustration and depression stages will be.
So in a nutshell, that’s what’s going on in my head at any given moment, sometimes all in one day! But at the end of the day, I'm glad I'm here, I'm sure I'm learning something from all this.
little pruna, over and out.
Quote for today:
“Experience: that most brutal of teachers. But you learn, my God do you learn.”
-C.S. Lewis
And I just smile, mentally let out a sigh and think, "so go do it!". The truth is, it’s not as glamorous or adventurous as people think. I’m not bushwhacking through the rainforest delivering life-saving vaccines to children who have no access to a medical facility. I don’t live in a hut (although I’ve always wanted to), I don’t sit cross-legged in a circle while teaching community members the importance of keeping the water supply clean or how to plant sustainable crops (that’s my next goal). Yes, I have hot water, internet and a flushing toilet. I work 9 hours a day, most days in a hospital office. Change takes a lot longer than one might expect. I’m sorry to have dashed your grandiose illusions of my life. But yes, you are right, some things are definitely different and more difficult, but at the end of the day it really just comes down to your attitude, which sometimes isn’t entirely rational. As anyone who as ever traveled knows, one of the hardest things to deal with is Culture Shock. Everyone gets it, even people who travel a lot, although sometimes to a lesser extent. Often, it is subtle. Unlike its name, there are few occasions when you are downright shocked or flabbergasted by an event or custom.
4 stages of culture shock are generally labeled: honeymoon stage, the frustration stage,the depression stage, and finally, the acceptance stage. I’ve taken the liberty to describe them a bit for you based on my experiences and those of my peers.
1.Honeymoon stage, a.k.a, This is awesome!! Dude, look at all the awesome colors! Even the buildings that are crumbling have more character and look more artistic than any American building. Look and the cute little old man with no teeth and those cute little kids with no shoes trying to sell food to passersby. It’s so exotic and quaint at the same time! Did you see how the women carry their babies on their backs with just that little blanket to keep them from falling? Did you see that they sell water here in plastic little baggies instead of bottles? And milk comes in liter cartons than don’t have to be refrigerated until they are opened. That’s really smart. Everyone is so nice and accommodating. I love this place, I’m going to take pictures of EVERYTHING. This is going to be pure awesomeness. Best trip EVER.
2. Frustration stage, a.k.a, Rolling of the eyes. Ugh, why can’t people shower before coming onto the bus? Is it just me or does the whole country mumble when they talk while simultaneously yelling? How come they don’t sell cheeseburgers here? Don’t they know that they shouldn’t buy food from a vendor who just sneezed on her hand? Those kids aren’t so cute anymore after they tried to hustle me for that bag of mangos. Fantastic, another night without electricity. These crumbling buildings aren’t so quaint anymore, they keep leaking rain water on my bed. Do I have to do everything myself, everyone is so incompetent. Why doesn’t anyone pay attention to the stop signs or traffic signals? Don´t they have emissions laws here, there is so much smog coming out of these cars! Why don’t they have cheese burgers here?!! Could there be any more stray dogs around here, I mean, seriously.
3. Depression stage, a.k.a I wanna go hoommmmmmmmmmmme!!!! (while throwing a hissy fit and stomping your feet and hands on the ground.) This place sucks. Why did I ever come here? This was a mistake, I haven’t done anything, I’m wasting my time, people don’t listen to me, I don’t have any friends and no one to talk to. Did I mention that this sucks? I STILL can’t speak the language and I feel like an idiot. I’m tired of all these bugs and having to kill giant ants with my bare hands. This is really hard, there’s no way I can accomplish what I came here to do. If one more person calls me gringa/branca/ Americana/ la chica/ mi amor/baby, I’m going to slap him upside the head. And for the love of Pete, can’t I just cross the street one time without being almost run over/honked at/ whistled at/ winked at/ being asked for money/ or being given the evil eye? I want to eat ice cream and cheeseburgers and walk on carpet and flush toilet paper down the toilet. This place is death. How do these people handle living here? I miss my mommy.
4. Acceptance stage, a.k.a, Sigh, I better pick myself off the floor, I look kinda silly down here. Okay, so I may have overreacted, just a tiny incy wincy little bit. I can’t go home, I promised myself/my boss/my organization that I would stay for X amount of time. It’s really not that bad, I just got to suck it up, pull it together and reign in that trembling bottom lip. Remember a few months ago when I met my two friends and we went on that awesome hike and celebrated by birthday? That was pretty cool. And don’t forget about last week when I was able to convince my boss that on the importance of monthly evaluations? And did you see that those patients were actually reading your educational posters?! And remember when you were walking in town and someone asked YOU for directions?
This is the stage where all my years playing volleyball kick in, when you yell these chants to encourage each other: Okay, you got this, you can do it! (Get) right back (up)! Be aggressive! Push through, we’re almost there! Stay on your toes! Anticipate! Great kill! Dive, sacrifice your body! Okay, maybe that last two aren’t really relevant here, but you get my point, this whole stage can be summed up with: I think I can, I think I can, I think I can, I CAN! Take a deep breath kid, you got this! ¡ánimo!
And then, repeat steps 1-4. Yes, that’s right, it’s not over, this is a never ending cycle. For some strange reason, I never seem to get stage 2, but everyone is different. Your whole time abroad will be filled with culture shock, though the longer you are the there the longer the acceptance and honeymoon phase will be and the less intense the frustration and depression stages will be.
So in a nutshell, that’s what’s going on in my head at any given moment, sometimes all in one day! But at the end of the day, I'm glad I'm here, I'm sure I'm learning something from all this.
little pruna, over and out.
Quote for today:
“Experience: that most brutal of teachers. But you learn, my God do you learn.”
-C.S. Lewis
Hey Tina I was one of those jealous people saying Aw I wish I could travel the world like Tina is doing... Hang in there...you are doing an amazing job!! Love you! Yoli
ReplyDeleteI love your posts!!! Seriously.. I do.
ReplyDeleteThe stages of culture shock seem to be rather rough, but I know out of anyone you can handle them. I have faith. :) :)